This Chapter of My Life Is Titled: Self-Centered
For most of my life, being called self-centered would have felt like an insult. It implied selfishness, pride and the overall sentiment that a person thinks they’re more important than everyone else.
Lately, I've been thinking about that word differently. This chapter of my life is, in fact, titled Self-Centered. Not because I think I'm the center of everyone else's world, but because for the first time in a very long time, I'm becoming the center of my own.
For years, life has been measured by what everyone else needed from me. I am someone's employee, mom, daughter, friend…
And while those roles are beautiful, somewhere along the way I stopped asking one simple question: What brings me peace?
I had become so accustomed to adapting that I started accepting things simply because they had become familiar. I normalized situations that weren't actually healthy. I convinced myself that certain dynamics were "just how life is," even when they no longer aligned with the person I wanted to become.
These days I'm locked in on paying attention to how things make me feel. If something consistently drains my energy, steals my peace, or requires me to become someone I'm not, I don't ignore that feeling anymore; I evaluate it.
Centering myself
You cannot build an authentic life while abandoning yourself.
If it's unnecessary, I let it go. If it's uncomfortable but necessary, whether that's having a difficult conversation, healing old wounds, or learning a new skill, I adjust my mindset instead of avoiding it.
There's a big difference between discomfort that grows you and discomfort that diminishes you. Learning the difference has been life changing. The more self-centered I've become, the better I've become for everyone around me.
I'm more present with my children because I'm not constantly pouring from an empty cup. I'm a better friend because I'm no longer showing up out of obligation but from genuine desire. I'm more confident at work because I understand my strengths instead of trying to fit someone else's definition of success.
And perhaps most importantly...I'm finally showing up for myself.
That doesn't mean every day is perfect.
There are still moments where I second-guess myself. Days when old habits try to creep back in. Times when I wonder if choosing myself is somehow wrong. Then I remember something I've been learning throughout this healing journey: You cannot build an authentic life while abandoning yourself.
Self-centered doesn't have to mean self-absorbed. Sometimes it simply means being centered within yourself by honoring our own values, needs and protecting your peace.
Creating a life that feels good from the inside out, not because it's perfect, but because it's true to who you are.
So yes... I am indeed Self-Centered.
Reflection Questions
What have you accepted as "normal" simply because you've lived with it for so long?
What activities make you lose track of time because you genuinely enjoy them?
Is there something you've wanted to try but have been waiting for permission?
Which relationships leave you feeling energized, and which leave you feeling depleted?
What would change if you made yourself the center of your own life—not everyone else's?
Maybe your next chapter doesn't require becoming someone new. Maybe it simply requires coming home to yourself.
